Understanding Acceptance

It finally occurred to me that acceptance is not something done passively. It is an active decision to not overreact. It is the condition in which one takes the energy usually powering reactions and puts it into searching the situation for truth.

To achieve this, one has to make a decision to give up emotional attachments, and the attachment to one's unthinking exercise of emotions.

No wonder it's so rare.

And precious.

Warfare for God

Christiane Amanpour's documentary on "God's Warriors" is quite difficult to watch if one is spiritually inclined. Why militancy has a part in anyone's religion is quite beyond me, but to have it becoming associated with spirituality literally defines blasphemy: offense against the sacred.

Part of my long ambivalence about organized religion stems from the imperialism of large organizations. Humans have again and again proved themselves incapable of organizing large groups of people without creating equally large opposing groups of people. Maybe that's why we have periodically had Prophets, people who would remind us of this fact, offer an alternative, and try to demonstrate this alternative.

But as a species, we're just not so smart. So far, we have not shown that much capacity to listen and learn.

A wit once said that human history is "just one damn thing after another." Yes, well, recorded human history is a catalogue of repeated and massive warfare, a record of just how far we are from the sacred, of how we have repeatedly damned one another and ourselves through violence and expediency (which are probably identical).

For some reason, there are lots of people who think that we should continue on this path.

So, I would say that, if one is truly searching for the sacred, run, run quickly from compelling speakers of any persuasion. Reject emotional appeals to self-serving causes like religious partisanship, any activism that creates divisions between people, and all hierarchies of people. Even patriotism is suspect. Reject any cause or creed that excludes anyone.

Now that's a challenge I can get excited about.

Everyday Life And Death

A couple of weeks ago, my mother fell at her home and could not get up. She is 84 years old and lives alone now. A neighbor came to her aide, after several hours.

She is very much attached to staying at her home, in a small town in Maryland, To this end, her focus, for the last 10 years, has been to create community around her, something that is as surprising to her children as it has been spectacularly successful.

My family has never been known for its, uh, social abilities. We all tend to be somewhat reclusive, though this is due more to discomfort than to active avoidance of others. We have never been a cozy, happy group, and have never truly felt that we truly belonged anywhere, as far as I know. We have all been individually plagued with extreme social anxiety.

So my mother came up with an amazing ability to create a nurturing community about her, just as she came into the need for it. I am sure that this was partly a conscious effort on her part, but this does not diminish my admiration for her achievement.

She has neighbors who mow her lawn, take out her trash, and drive her to appointments when she cannot drive herself. There are members of her church who show up with food or offer to weed her prized rose garden. Her former singing group (Sweet Adelines) visit every week and another family includes her in all major holidays as part of their family.

In short, she has established herself as a part of people's lives, just by being there. I believe that this is partly because she supplies people with a reminder of their own mortality, a living example of gentle decline. She awakens people's compassion and love, giving people a chance, all too rare in modern life, to act from their better nature.

It is beautiful and heartbreaking. I love her very much.